How to Defeat Larger Attackers

I received a few questions after the "SDTS is not Krav Maga" post regarding how to defeat larger attackers. For starters in the SDTS we naturally assume everyone who chooses to mess with us is bigger. After all, when sizing someone up, it's the first thing you evaluate (um..that's why it's called it "sizing up").

We don't just assume he's bigger. We also assume he has friends, is armed, has intent on harming us and is willing to do so. We also make some more assumptions...like we may be fighting on ice, in the parking lot, or even in the sand or in the woods. We also think that we're probably going to be attacked when we're sick, tired, injured, older or otherwise distracted. Yes we make a lot of ASSumptions at the SDC, but they're not in our favor.

That being said, the question on the table is: How do you defeat larger attackers?
We address this from Module 1 of the SDTS and we continue this line of thinking throughout. The first and most obvious way is close quarters weapons. Impact weapons like black jacks, yawara sticks, sap gloves, steel toe boots and shoes, fist packs, clubs, axe handles, chains, hammers and a wide array of nasty little tools can help you even the score quick, fast and in a hurry. ( Reference SDTS Modules 9 and 11)
Let's also not forget about edged weapons, t-handles, boot knives, push daggers and anything else you can conceal and carry. (SDTS Modules 9 and 11)

Oh and there's also "non-lethal" methods like pepper spray, pepper foam and stun guns. Yes I've even heard real guns will do the trick too. So before you go running off to take on the world with nothing in your hand but your pecker and good looks, you might just want to consider the obvious. Methods that consider themselves military or even just self defense methods that don't have a systematic approach to offensive weapons training are suspect and can not be considered REAL self defense.
Krav maga for example only teaches weapons DEFENSE and has no real systematic approach to edged, impact or even firearms. Hmm...the Israeli Special forces don't use any of these?!?!

The Self Defense Training System, self defense in general for that matter is about one thing and one thing only...winning the fight by whatever means necessary. If that means using a weapon, then so be it. You may be morally opposed to using any form of weapon on another human being (but I'm sure that if some piece of shit was raping your wife or daughter you may make a concession). At the end of the day it's my job to give you the tools and it's your job to decide whether or not you're going to use them. I can't tell you, but I also can't sleep at night without giving you the option.

I once heard some puss- I mean some one say that "weapons teach you to be a violent person". This is the most inane, misguided and self indulgent notion I've ever heard. Weapons are a tool, they have been since Cain hit Abel with a rock. In the end it's about winning, no points for style peaches.

Not what you expected so far? We're the SDC, I'm not going to blow smoke up your dress and lead off with the LEAST effective form of self defense...empty hands.

Regarding empty hand techniques, this is what you don't want to do: grapple. Getting on the ground with someone who outweighs you by over 50 to 100 pounds is insane. Have you seen a lot of great heavyweight grapplers? Me neither that's because when you're on the ground you need to create space between you and your opponent and trust me, when you weigh 160 and the guy on top of you is 260 there "ain't no space." In all my years I've know maybe 3 guys on the planet who could submit very large people on the ground. They are all world class athletes and weighed at least 180 to 200 pounds, you're not them so please don't bother.

Striking the body, huge waste of time as well; especially with a larger attacker. Add to that clothing and jackets and your strikes will be muted. Your best bet ALWAYS is to attack his extremities: neck and head, knees and shins. The testicles are obviously a great target but are a little tricky to get to, you might want to start with some chit-chat and a few drinks...sorry, I couldn't resist.

The genitals are placed where they are on the body because they need to be protected and you will have to be at a close range to attack them. If you do attack with a kick, like a saddle kick or a point of boot kick you should distract him either verbally with a question or physically with something fast to his face like a finger dart. This will eliminate the flinch reaction that every man on the planet does when anything goes near that region that was not invited.

As detailed in SDTS module 1, knock out areas exist on the neck and mouth line as well as the sides and base of the skull. The only secret to exploiting these areas is that you need to hit them with enough force to cause a disruption in the nervous system and blood flow. How much force varies from person to person, but I assure you it's not as much as you think.

Tips to defeating larger attackers (or any attacker for that matter)
Use Weapons: Weapons were invented for a reason, they make the job easier.
Hit Hard: You must train to hit with power. The more power and the faster you can hit your target the faster you will win the fight
Hit First: You can easily discover someone's intentions well BEFORE they throw the first punch. If you're facing a good street fighter you don't need to worry about the first punch, you need to worry about the second, third, forth, fifth and sixth punch.
Attack the Extremities: lower legs, neck, head
Attack soft targets: eyes, base of the nose, genitals

Every fight comes down to Distance, Momentum and Balance. Close the distance, gain the momentum and keep him off balance. Always train as if nothing will work. In training, keep hitting and trying to destroy your target with every blow- it's not sparring and there's no such thing as "over kill".

All things being equal, the fight will always go to the bigger and stronger. Being smaller means you have to make up the difference with technique, technology, tactics and training. The only secret is to attack, attack, attack. Sure, there's some work ahead of you, SIMPLE does not mean EASY. If you want magic, go some place else, if you want the truth, stick around.

Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.

SDTS is NOT Krav Maga

Don't believe the hype. Sure Krav Maga "says" a lot of things similar to the SDTS but you can't judge a system by its marketing. Even though there are some good techniques in Krav Maga, a few good techniques or concepts does not mean it's effective.

In order to evaluate a system you need to look at it from a complete learning perspective. Most people will go through a curriculum technique by technique and judge each individual reaction to a situation as a good or bad, this is the wrong approach. In order to look at any system as a whole you need to look at it from the training experience perspective.

Take mathematics for instance. You learn basic principles and then you discover how to apply those basic principles to more complex equations. The same holds true for self defense. You need to see the same, viable concepts running through every situation. A viable concept must work under the conditions it's intended to work.

The problem with martial arts and most self defense systems is that they are based on the same formula: block, catch or grab the initial attack, strike, then finish with a wrist lock, take down or another controlling technique. They require a set of motor skills and reasoning that are not available under fight or flight circumstances.

Martial arts also attempt to provide different reactions to each individual type of attack. They look at each assault as an isolated incident from the attacker's perspective instead of looking at it from the defenders point of view. Meaning, here's the attack and if I were to disable this guy I would do X.Y.Z. the defender's point of view its about development of muscle memory and your ability to recall those actions under stress when you least expect it. Martial arts focus on your attacker while The SDTS focuses on what you will be able to do when you're attacked.

For illustration we took three attacks, a double collar grab, a collar grab with a knife to the throat and a collar grab with a gun to your head and compared the Krav Maga defense to the SDTS defense. Now we couldn't find any Krav Maga defenses for a knife with a collar grab or a gun with a collar grab either. Maybe they don't grab the shirt a lot in Israel, who knows, but we did manage to find a few to illustrate our point.

At first glance the the primary difference between the Self Defense Training System (SDTS) and Krav Maga are:

Krav Maga uses both gross and finite motor skills
The SDTS uses only gross motor skills
Krav Maga requires you to learn different, unrelated skill sets for each individual scenario
The SDTS gives you only one skill set for hundreds of possible scenarios
Krav Maga requires you to shift focus from weapon to attacker than back to weapon again
The SDTS has no real shift focus, after you clear the weapon it's attack, attack attack
Krav Maga assumes that you're only going to need to strike your attacker once (with the exception in Scenario 2 b)
The SDTS knows that not all strikes hit there mark and trains you to continue your counter attack until the threat is gone

Considerations
We know that under extreme stress you can not use fine [finite] motor skills. Fine motor skills are the coordination of small muscle movements which occur e.g., in the fingers, usually in coordination with the eyes. In application to motor skills of hands (and fingers) the term dexterity is commonly used. When applied to the theory of human aptitude this is called manual dexterity. Twisting the wrist, catching or grabbing an opponents hand, small movements and manipulations are all fine motor skills. On the contrary, gross motor skills involve large muscle groups and body motion.

Under stress you will only be able to focus on a single purpose. We know that once you decide to act you will continue to do that act until it's complete. If you decide to train a wrist lock, under stress you will continue to attempt that lock until you succeed. People fleeing a burning theater will burn to death trying the same locked door over and over again and will never look for another way out. Since you can only successfully focus on one purpose it must be to disable your attacker as fast as possible. Anything less will cause you to focus on something less critical, like a disarm. Look, if you hit him until he's unconscious, you won't need the disarm but if you try to wrestle the weapon away from someone who's has fight left in them you're leaving yourself vulnerable.

Scenario 1 Krav Maga defense against a double lapel grab you see a wrist lock (finite motor skills), and elbow strike and a cross stomp (finite motor skills). Shifting focus from hand strikes to kicks at close range is a little dicey. Why bother when you can just crack him in the head continually.



Notice the "stiff arm attack". When someone does grab you in this manner they do it to intimidate. That means they will jack you up and get eye to eye. Now the instructors does mention this type of attack but refers to a completely different set of skills to defend it! Adding another defense you have to remember.

Scenario 2 A Krav Maga defense against a knife to your throat clears the weapon (good), kicks him in the nuts (good), does a wrist twist (shitty). Here we see only one strike and then a useless wrist twist take down. Also, why does this technique differ so much from scenario 1? You could easily clear the weapon and elbow strike him.

Also note that this is another stiff arm attack. Look, if someone is mugging you in the street they are going to get in your face in intimidate you. They're also not going to want to draw attention to themselves. That means they're going to be as discreet as possible. Coming in close not only is more intimidating, it conceals the weapon from the rest of the world.

Scenario 2 B Krav Maga defense against a knife to your throat requires you to clear the weapon (good), punch him in the face (good), then go to the elbow hook and start stabbing him with his own knife (ridiculous). Again, this starts off great but then get's ridiculous. However, it's good that he repeatedly bashes his attacker in the face, but then he goes for the cutesy, make him stab himself bullshit. Again, more stiff arm attacks from the bad guy.



Krav Maga Scenario 3 starts off great, clears the weapon (good), cracks the guy in the face (great) and then goes to some ridiculous disarm. You have the guy on the ropes, the gun pointing away from you, why not continue to bash his head in?!?!?

The beginning of this defense is similar to scenario 2 defense. What they really should do is use the repeated face punch for ALL scenarios. Heck, guy jacks you up, punch him in the face, the guy sticks a knife to your throat or a gun in your face, clear the weapon and punch him in the face repeatedly. That would be splendid. But they don't, they chose to get fancy and do the same martial arts BS.

A final note on Krav Maga defense 3. Punching your opponent in the head runs the risk of breaking your knuckles on his jaw or skull. Try grabbing anything with a shattered hand and squeezing, let alone performing a wrist lock-disarm, securing the weapon, taking aim and squeezing the trigger. This defense assume two major "what ifs" 1. That you can hit him hard enough once to enable you to disarm him and 2. That you didn't break your knuckles on his skull.

Krav Maga uses the typical martial arts formula is this, grab or block the initial attack, strike and then finish with a fancy wrist lock, take down or controlling technique. You know what the problem is with teaching fancy moves, when you teach them, that's all anyone wants to practice. They gloss over the strike and focus on the harder tasks, the block, grab and fancy finish. It's only natural that you do this, you can't help it. The obvious problem is this: you pay no attention to the most important part, the strikes that will disable your enemy. The result when your stressed is that you will focus on the thing you spent the most time on...the fancy shit that your body has no physiological chance of pulling off (remember the finite motor skill issue?). The result will be some gross motor skill interpretation of what you practiced and it will be neither effective or fancy.

Another glaring problem is that only 1 defense (2b) showed any sort of repeated striking. All of the other defenses assume you're going to knock your target silly with one strike!!!! Those of you who have been there know one thing's for certain, in the street you miss...a lot.

That being said, here's the SDTS reaction to ALL of these scenarios:


That's it, one technique for 3 different scenarios. Sure it's not completely sexy, but it's brutal and it works. It trains you to use one set of techniques. Do you realize what happens when you train similar techniques over and over again? They become awesome. No one got into the hall of fame for knowing a lot of moves, they got there from doing a few things really well. Bruce Lee said it himself, I don't fear the man who's done 1000 kicks one time, I fear the man who's done one kick a thousand times.

Conditioning for combat requires you program a behavior that you will do subconsciously. SAYING that you will remember to hit him repeatedly is not the same as practicing to hit him repeatedly. Once you start to injure him you need to continue it until he's no longer a threat. You can disarm him when he's unconscious. This business of taking a firearm away from a man who's will to point it at you is stupid, movie, Hollywood bullshit.

At the end of the day Krav Maga is like any other martial art. It teaches you separate techniques for each individual situation. It follows the "block or grab initial attack, strike and fancy finish" formula of martial arts. Let's call that the B.G.S.F.F. formula (look another fucking acronym is born!). It also assumes that every strike you do hits it's target with devastating power. The only difference is between Krav Maga and other martial arts is the lack of sparring!

A final note: training to hit and destroy requires that you actually hit something repeatedly. Hitting the air, pulling your punches or striking soft cushy pads doesn't do the trick. We suggest you train to hit things as hard or harder that all the surfaces of the human body have to offer...oh and don't forget about belt buckles, helmets and anything else kids are wearing these days.

I lied...I have yet another final note.

There's another reason why the SDTS doesn't punch and why I highly doubt that Krav Maga was ever anything but a commercial attempt to market the Israeli culture. In a military application, punching is useless. Punching with a closed fist will run you the risk of shattering your hand. When you break the knuckles of your forefinger you can not use that finger. Try squeezing the trigger of your UZI when your hand is smashed to bits. Try gripping a knife or anything for that matter when the for knuckles of your hand are crushed. In the SDTS you learn to use the heel of your hand or the edge of your hand as your primary strikes. You may dislocate a finger or two with the edge of hand, but your primary gripping fingers will not receive any damage. This will still enable you to grip a firearm or edged weapon. Any military system that uses a closed fist is highly suspect. Considering that most of your targets will have helmets, firearms and other gear that will turn your fist into oatmeal.

At the end of the day Krav Maga is really no different than any other martial art. It's just marketed better.

Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.

It's About Kicking Ass- Damian Ross, The Self Defense Company

When you get down to it, there is only one real reason anyone gets into martial arts, to know how to kick someone's ass. Yep, I said it and I'll say it again, I don't care if you're a Shaolin Monk or Thelonious Monk, you got into martial arts because you wanted to know how to kick someone's ass. It's like the only real reason to go to a dance club is to hook up (don't trust anyone, gay or straight who says it's to dance, or the music). There's a reason why you stop going when you're attached, it's because you don't have to.

I know you probably give explanations for choosing your martial arts path to friends and family. I'm sure the reasons range from fitness to spiritual. Unfortunately that reasoning is pure and complete bullshit since there are dozens of other hobbies from yoga to triathlons, that will give you either or both of those benefits. Side note: Anyone uses the term "path" or "spiritual" in a sentence needs a swift boot to nuts.

The only reason ANYONE EVER signs up for a martial arts class is learn how to fight. Think about it, why "martial arts"? The only possible explanation is that you want to know how to physically impose your will over another human being. This doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you human and aware that sometimes people misbehave and are in dire need of a smack down.

Don't give me that "reluctant warrior" crap, the "I don't like violence but if pushed I will..." save that speech for the dojo moms. I don't care who you are, when you put a bully in his place or fight to survive and win, there's a certain satisfaction that comes from that. I've been around all levels of martial artists, soldiers, cops and defensive tactics instructors and when you're among your peers you can't help but crack a smile when telling those stories. It's not a sadistic smile, it's more of a "glad I was the one who walked away" smile that's a combination of satisfaction and relief.

Then there's the people who have actually faced REAL assaults and attempted rapes. Do you think they want to spend time learning "alternative and peaceful solutions" for the next time? Guess again. Most of them- at least the ones that The Self Defense Company train, just want to know how to win the fight as fast as possible by whatever means necessary. I realize we hit a certain demographic and the "peaceful alternative" types don't exactly contact us, hmmmm. I wonder why that is?

Let's call a spade a spade (don't be racist), It doesn't matter if it's Muay Thai or Tae Bo, you get into martial arts to kick ass and take names. If you wanted to get fit and be spiritual you would go take pilates, yoga or some other activity that will get you in touch with your feminine side. If just wanted to get fit you could do a whole host of things to torture yourself on your time off. All of these endeavors come with the social element you claim from martial arts.

In the end, just spare me the rhetoric. There are very few things that are better than standing up for yourself and providing a good old "foot to ass" solution. I've competed in sports all my life from judo, jujitsu, football, baseball, tae kwon do, wrestling and the list goes on. When it came to martial arts, it was just another sport. It wasn't until I started training in the methods that lead to the SDTS that a light went off and I realized that THIS IS WHAT I GOT INTO MARTIAL ARTS FOR!!! No bullshit, just demolish that guy in front of you as quickly as possible. No forms, no stances, no bowing, no rules!!

This is the world we live in and when it comes to dealing with violence there is only one response that ALWAYS WORKS, it is swift, brutal and unforgiving. Live your life ethically, show forgiveness and compassion before and after you need to use violence. The people who say violence isn't the answer are scared, rightfully so. On the other hand it's the people who use violence as a means to ensure that those people can spout their non-violent, pacifistic theories. In the words of the late Richard Jenni "Violence may not solve anything, but it sure stops a lot of shit."

Example? How about World War II? I'm sure the people of Poland, France and all of the Jews, Gypsies and Homosexuals put in death camps might have a different opinion. I'm sure the good people of Afghanistan loved the Russian occupation or the Taliban rule. Sure, the jury is still out what's going on over there but one things for sure, nothing has blown up in the US since 9-11 and that was over a decade ago, say what you will but I know there are nations of people who would enjoy seeing scores of US and British citizens dead. And believe me, they are trying everyday. So (knock on wood) something IS WORKING!

It doesn't matter if it's global conflict or close combat, a good offense in the ONLY defense! Attack, attack, attack until they can't attack you. The only way to do that is to inflict more injury than your target can inflict on you. It's a simple, little equation.

I got into martial arts to know how to systematically kick someone's ass. There was a while there, yes, I may have sipped the kool-aide and believed my own bullshit. OK, maybe I didn't sip it, I got drunk and took a shower int it, but even I eventually woke up and smelled the pepper spray.

Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.

Sacrifice or Regret - Damian Ross, The Self Defense Company

Take your pick. Every choice you make comes with this price tag. Do you sacrifice something of lesser value for something of greater value or do you let the opportunity pass you by. Every time you say NO to something you're saying YES to something else. NO to studying means YES to failing. NO to working out means YES to being a fat shit. NO to training means YES to being vulnerable.

When I was a kid and I had to leave my friends to go to practice my dad would say, you're true friends would always be there. He was right. Later as friends were joined by girls, it was a little tougher but after practice, after the sacrifice the world looked a little brighter, things tasted a little sweeter, heck even the air was a little crisper. My sacrifice made me appreciate the things around me that I normally took for granted. (Girls like me more too!)

After the sacrifice came the rewards of success: admiration from peers, family and a good education. Later when my efforts turned towards martial arts and self defense, I had success in the it was the knowledge of knowing that I could protect myself and the people around me. Knowing that whatever task I was given, I would be able to accomplish that task. Oh and yes, girls liked it too and my family and friends were equally impressed...did I mention the girls?

Later I would discover how to adapt those sacrifice skills to my professional life and family life. It was easy and the rewards have been many. I would like to say I'm lucky, but luck is where preparation meets opportunity. Preparation comes from sacrifice.

Hey, not taking action is easy and it's easy to make excuses...they FEEL REALLY GOOD!!! The easy way always does. Like the saying goes "Hard work pays off in the future but laziness pays off NOW!" . But the payoff of hard work is infinitely better and more profound than laziness could ever dare to be.

It's never the perfect time. It's never the perfect time to change jobs, never the perfect time to get married, buy a house, have kids or go back to school. Any major decision comes with this feeling of the time has to be perfect. It's never going to be perfect. The perfect time is an illusion, it doesn't exist. To make change you have to take one bold step to start the wheels turning and the momentum moving. Like Newton says, a body at rest tends to stay at rest, but a body in motion tends to stay in motion. Once you start making decisions and taking action, things begin to happen.

The most successful businesses, the most successful training regiments, hell the most successful anything didn't start on a Monday at 9:00am and it sure as hell didn't start on January 1. It begins the second you decide it's time and the moment you get off your ass and do something. There will always be something pulling at you, it's life and you have to kick life in the ass and put it in it's place. Unless someone is sick or dying, it can be managed.

Short term loss vs. Long term gain.

What are you REALLY sacrificing? Lest take SDTS Training for example. A handful of hours per week for 8 to 12 months? How much of that time is spent watching TV, on the computer or eating and drinking things you probably shouldn't? If you look at your life, there is always going to be a roadblock. If you truly don't have any time for yourself each week...you really need to change your life.

If you work at a rate that doesn't allow you time for anything else, you need to check your life.

If your family obligations are so over bearing that you don't have anytime for yourself, you need to check your life.

We all get busy from time to time but you need to make the time and create the habit. Great things don't happen because it was a convenient time. Great things happen when someone stands up and takes action.

On the other hand, Regret is bitter. Regret doesn't require any action. All you need to do is sit and watch opportunity pass you by. Regret is what makes people miserable. Regret reminds you how old you are. It tells you how fat and out of shape you've gotten. Regret is a douche bag. He's that nagging voice that tell you times are passed and you had your chance. Fuck Regret, make him your bitch.

Tomorrow always comes again and again until one day you're at an age that, well...you're just too damn old.

Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.

Haters Gonna Hate- Damian Ross, The Self Defense Company

I love the show Kitchen Nightmares. It's not Ramsay's over the top persona, or how he rips into people (if you get a chance to watch some of his earlier shows from the BBC he's a lot more mellow and tolerable) it's the combative attitude of the people trapped in a failing business.

He comes in, a successful, Michelin Star chef and Restauranteur and tells them exactly what they need to know and every time, without fail, they fight him every step of the way until eventually they break down and give in. When I watch the show with my kids we call it "When Adults Cry" and point out every time it happens. What else am I going to do? They're a little too young to play the drinking game...

The same holds true for the show Bar Rescue, Salon Take Over or most any other business make over show. The excuse for failure is ALWAYS something external: the economy, the competition, the neighborhood, etc. It's never something that the business owner does. Yet, upon further inspection it's always the product, service and atmosphere that are all lacking one way or another.

The process is always the same: expert comes in and tells them the truth, their product is awful, their place is filthy and how service is dreadful. The business owner goes through anger, denial, acceptance and finally follow through. Note that the ones that fail are usually too far gone or don't follow through. But the formula for success is always the same.

There's no place better to see this type of angered resistance than in the self defense world. People will fight me to the end, until one day they realize, I'm right because, like Chef Ramsay, I know the truth about self defense. I know what works. You can tell me that I don't own a black car all you want, but I know I drove up in one and it's parked outside. To me you sound like all those failed business owners on Kitchen Nightmares holding on to something that simply doesn't exist. I've been where you're standing and have the black belts to prove it. Eventually you will come around or quit or remain stubborn and cling to a method that really was not intended for life or death situations.

There's a reason that the majority of people who enroll in the SDTS are former or lifelong martial artists who have had real life, adult street fights. They understand the reality of what happens and have had enough insight to reflect on their training and identify the obvious problems.

The biggest issue with most systems is that they're only PART right. They have a few solid ideas and concepts and then fill it in with what ever they can think of to make it larger and more complicated than it needs to be. People get pissed when I tell them you don't need to spend all that time practicing and learning technique upon technique. It's like martial arts hoarding. They feel secure in the fact that they "know" a lot of stuff. But more is not better, it's just more and knowing a lot of things is A LOT worse than knowing a few things well.

"I fear not the man who has practiced 10000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10000 times." ~ Bruce Lee

In fact, instead of training in those complex moves, why don't you lift some weights and do some real cardio? After all, the over all tactical benefit of being physically fit will greatly out weigh the cool parlor trick you're trying to pawn off as self defense.

The road to self defense is simple...but not easy. How many black belts do I need to have to tell you that I know the f'ing difference? Sure, your style is different and your instructor knows the truth. I can't speak for every instructor on the planet, but after 30 plus years of this stuff I know that the vast majority of systems out there are WAY OFF! It only takes me about one lesson to determine whether there's anything worth while. To be honest, I can probably do it in 5 minutes, but I'm just being polite.

People hate me because I will tell you that all of the time and money you invested is pretty much wasted (unless you got yourself in shape and made some friends, than it's not completely useless). From a self defense perspective I can pretty much guarantee that what you're doing is useless. Sure a punch is a punch and a choke is a choke but do you really need to train 8 hours a week just to punch someone in the jaw?!?!? NO YOU DON'T and I don't care what your sensei says (I have more black belts than him, so there).

The funny thing about martial arts, self defense, yoga, pilates or any other subculture you can get your hands on is the people. More often than not, people seek these activities to fill a void in their lives. That explains why people loose their shit when you tell them they're wrong. They come back with the witty retort:
"1 billion Chinese people can't be wrong" my answer to that is, "Shit yes they can, explain communism?"

The truth is, most people are wrong (or right a small percentage of the time). You have to love Jack Nicholson's line in The Bucket List: “If life has taught me anything it’s that 95% of the people are always wrong.” Do you know who's right? The successful, happy people. Heck, they crucified Jesus so I guess I'm doing OK. (Did he just make a Jesus reference? Yes I did).

If you make a stand and no one reacts than either you don't matter or your stand doesn't matter. Hate me if you will, but for every one of you there's a free thinking. ass-kicking person right behind you who's done sipping the Kool-Aide and just wants to know the truth about self defense which can be summed up in a few words:

1. Inflict the maximum amount of damage to your target in the shortest amount of time possible.
2. Cause more injury than you receive.
3. Stay in good physical condition
4. Use whatever tools you have at your disposal to expedite points 1 and 2.

That's it. Hell, I don't care if you train in the SDTS or not. OK, that's a lie, I want you to train in it, that's kind of my point of this post. But, if you adopted that 4 point attitude you would quickly eliminate a lot of crap from your training.

Always seek to simplify and develop the skills you already have. Sure you can punch, but can you shatter a mans jaw in six places? OK, how about 8?

There's no such thing as overkill because you "can't over win"!
Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.

Bullying 2011

This is the story of 13 year old, Philadelphia boy, Nadin Khoury who was routinely bullied by a seven, 17 year old boys. The abuse got so bad that he would come home from school missing shoes, money and showing signs of fighting. This continued for some time until one day it escalated to a horrific level. Fortunately one of the sadistic perpetrators took video and posted it on youtube. You can see the brutality of that video
HERE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iaYCNKLkVw)

This goes far beyond name calling, knocking your books over, stealing your lunch money or playing keep away with your hat. The abuse didn't start at this level. All bullying starts out small and escalates. Unfortunately the current wave of anti-bullying policy is increasing awareness but is falling short in effectiveness.

If you have kids in school you know there's a huge anti-bullying policy. Schools have adopted a zero tolerance position and in fact, here in the republic of New Jersey, students can opt to bypass the school administration all together and go straight to the police. This does lead to some false accusations, but all in all, it brings the issue of bullying to the forefront, which at the end of the day is a good thing.

With all awareness and access in place, why did Nadin refuse to seek help? Even after this video was posted on youtube, he was still reluctant to point fingers and name names. His for this was reason was simple, "I didn't want to look like a punk". Say what you will as an adult, but this is the reality of teenage life. Your image in front of your peers is everything. Getting a kid to "tell" above the age of 11 is almost a miracle. Even if they anonymously report a bullying incident, at some point they are going to have to own up to that accusation publicly.

Right now the only solution anti-bullying policy provides is "Report It." This seems to work on the grammar school level, but once they hit middle school it becomes less reasonable and kids will look to avoid the situation all together instead of looking like a "rat". Most kids will try to suck it up and we see the results of that in teen suicide and substance abuse.

Furthermore, a lot of instances of bullying happen off school grounds and after school hours. The "Report It" policy is all well and good, but what about when there's no one around and you're cornered. Just because he's a bully that doesn't mean he's stupid. He's going to wait until he won't get caught. This leaves you with the very real problem of escape and survival and the proverbial "Now What?!?!"

With the exception of California, schools offer no tactical solution and discourage kids from using any sort of physical force to escape. The reason why they don't teach defensive tactics: liability. Teaching kids to fight back and stand up for themselves puts them in an actionable position. But the truth is, kids need another option. Kids need to be empowered and know that there may come a time where running away is not an option.

Now, make no mistake, Nadin beating up 7 attackers who were significantly larger and more mature was not a possibility. But if the kid knew how to fight and escape he may have avoided this all together. If he knew how to stand up for himself, maybe those kids would have just moved on to someone else or stopped all together. One things for certain, he received a beating anyway and sometimes even if you're going down, take one or two of them with you (Life Lesson 107).

In the Family Safe Program (a little plug, but not too shameless) we teach kids how to identify the threat (which is easy) and escape (which is simple). We use methods from SDTS Module 5, modified for kids on much larger targets. The methods are designed to make the attacker pause just long enough for you to make your escape. If the kid can't run, at least he can do something and then make a break for it.

The stigma with teaching kids to fight is that we're teaching them to be violent. This thinking is naive and ignorant. Here's a news flash, people are already violent, it's part of human nature. The thing these putz's don't get is that people are good and people are bad. Bad people use violence to inflict their will on others, good people use violence to save themselves and others from being victimized by bad people. Learning to fight doesn't turn a person bad. If the person is truly bad they will figure out all sorts of ways to do bad things.

Standing up to bullies is a right of passage. We all have bullies in our lives. Some of us have stood up to them time and time again, while others have not had the courage to do so. The day you finally stand up for yourself is one of the greatest days of your life. I was in 4th grade and one of my friends was getting picked on by the local tough (who was a year older than us). I stood up for my buddy and did a little school yard ground and pound. Needless to say, he cried and went home and I felt like a rock star.

The safest way to learn to deal with bullies is as a child when the stakes are low and the risk of injury is minimal. When kids get older and stronger, the violence becomes more severe.

Another point to keep in mind is that both the victim and the bully learn their lesson. When a bully gets his nose bloodied he learns that people fight back and what he's doing is wrong. Current policy, depending on the severity of the harassment or assault may have the bully talked to or transferred. Which might not be such a great deterrent and cause the bully to become smarter about who and how he does it. While the bully knows he will get in trouble, he also knows that his target won't fight back. Bullies stop when they get resistance. A true bully picks on the weak because he knows there won't be a fight. Now that there's a fight, it changes everything.

The spirit of the anti-bullying laws are in the right place but like most laws, are only there to protect you after the fact. There will come a time when your child is off school grounds and faced with a potentially dangerous situation. Kids need the tools to stand up mentally and physically and grammar school is the time to do it. Like lion cubs, this age is meant for sparring and understanding all aspects of human nature. Children need to learn that it's not right to bully and be bullied and sometimes violence or more appropriately, use of force is necessary to stop unwanted action. As parents we want to protect our children, but in doing so we only prolong the inevitable.

I know people want to eradicate violence from the face of the earth. While this is a noble cause it's impossible. Instead you must arm the righteous with the tools to survive against the tyranny of others. The attempt to isolate our youth from the reality of physical violence is only creating a generation that is not equipped to handle those situations and in turn will become victimized mentally and physically. If kids can't learn how to deal with these issues at an early age they will no doubt have to face them when they are older and the stakes are much greater.

Side Note: In Nadin's case I have one question, Where was his mom?!?! Her kid's coming home missing shoes, bruises and finally when she sees the video on youtube she "urged him to go to the police." I don't know about you, but where I'm from no self respecting black woman is going to let her child take a beating like that. The women that I know would go down to that school and whoop some 17 year old ass! Needless to say, parents need to play an active role and assume some responsibility.

Train Honestly,


Damian Ross, CEO The Self Defense Company


Damian Ross is CEO of the Self Defense Company and developer of The Self Defense Training System, the most lethal and effective self defense system in the world, The Guardian Defensive Tactics Police Combatives Program, 60 minute Self Defense and the Family Safe Program. Mr. Ross also founded the Self Defense Instructor Program that helps people develop their self defense careers from the ground up. Mr. Ross is originally from Ridgewood, NJ where he was a High School Hall of Fame Athlete in football and wrestling as well as a varsity wrestling coach. He then went on to Lehigh University where he was a varsity wrestler and football player. Mr. Ross has 3 black belts, 4th Degree in Tekkenryu Jujutsu, 2nd Degree in Judo, 2nd Degree in Tae Kwon Do. In addition to his martial arts experience, Mr; Ross spent 8 years in the professional security and personal protection business. He is internationally recognized as one of the foremost authorities in reality based self defense.